sucks it does

Today I learned that letting go also means facing the obvious.  It is obvious that at some point, in several moments in the past, I saw a future.  I saw a life filled with promise, a joy that was mine to capture, a reason to breathe through mistakes, tears to shed for smiles, hugs to warm the cold chill of deception...there was this time. My weakness is not being weak enough, my strength is my memory. Boy is that stupid irony. It is foolish to think that solitude and self-pity can ever replace love.  It is foolish to hold on to memories that do not build but only tear down life or hold life in place.  My friends, hold on to the memories that build you up.  Hold on to the breathless moments that transcend your existence into jubilee.  There are many things that I want to forget but the fear of loosing this silly protective force field is strong.  This shear force field that produces a bark bigger than a bite is all I have right now.  Being transparent before was purely and openly rejected.  Lesson learned.....and still learning. Faith.....Hope.......and Love.